Ti Metto Il Cazzo In Culo E Te Lo Faccio Uscire Dalla Bocca

An ambiguous "ending" is a huge sell-out, a way for a writer to appease his entire audience. Let me just go on record to say that no T.P.O. writer or associate has or will ever ambiguously end a piece, unless of course they're heaping on the sarcasm. Which sounds like a kinda good idea, so maybe every post from here on out will end ambiguously, maybe it won't. Ooh. Are you getting as pissed at me as I am at myself for writing this? Isn't this the best way to really convince you that ending was elephant shit?

How much more money do you honestly want to make from this series, Mr. Chase? Everyone's going to buy the DVDs, cause everyone's loves being right. But what upsets me is that it's pretty clear what happens to Tony Soprano, I know it and you know it, Chase, and this isn't me being cute either, I'm going to reveal it, and it's really pretty simple, that is if you've read a book before. But ending it the way that Chase did, not showing it, allows idiots who haven't read any books to formulate so many illogically optimistic outcomes-- cause after all here was a real American badass, who never, ever could go down-- allows these half-wits to do what they do best, defend American immorality and general dooshy behavior.

But yeah, they whack Tony. Probably shoot him at least fifty times in the head. They probably kill A.J. too, because why leave the son alive to later exact vengeance? Look, the shots of the shady dudes being shady, the one shady guy going to the bathroom, the black guys blocking the restaurant's only exit-- what the fuck else is going to happen? Need more? In Tuesday's Inquirer, some lady brilliantly caught some details I hadn't, details which would suggest Paulie had his hand in it, which makes sense. He had motive, recall how he was shitting himself about having to take over the crew whose former bosses had all been whacked. Makes good sense to me.

But fuck this minutiae. In the history of literature all prideful, boastful, immoral, evil, megalomaniacal sociopaths fall. Tragedy, people. Shakespeare, baby. Balance and moderation have to be maintained. It's the way of things. Yin and Yang. Check and mate, America.